attitude Archives - The Caveman's Guide to Selling

Learn from lost business

February 15, 2016 by Bruce Leave a Comment

When you find out that you didn’t win business you had planned to win, or your client suddenly goes silent and all you hear are crickets, what do you do?

Do you disappear or, even worse, blame the client for being indecisive, disloyal, or less than intelligent?

What if, instead, you could learn from lost business? Maybe even sidestep the frustration by way of curiosity?

I believe you can and absolutely should.

The best approach when faced with losing business is to engage your curiosity by exploring why you lost it. No matter how uncomfortable it may be, you’ve got to get to the crux of the matter with your former client. This is the only way you will be able to spot and prepare for similar situations in the future.

Keep in mind exploring a loss is not the same thing as dwelling on it. The former presents an opportunity for growth and development, while the latter acts as a breeding ground for stagnation.

Of course you’ll never know if the information you’re given is in fact the real reason you’ve lost, but I can assure you, it’s a heck of a lot more productive (and helpful) than not asking at all! It also sends the message that you are a professional and that you care about continuing to improve and being the best you can be. Not a bad thing.

A rising tide lifts all boats

January 11, 2016 by Bruce Leave a Comment

Instead of battling over commission or business or putting others down in your industry, why not evangelize the need for your product or service? Why not elevate the entire industry?

Instead of becoming distracted by those who offer similar products or services, focus your attention on serving as an ambassador for the business and industry you operate within. Try to help make it as strong and reputable as possible. As the public’s perceived value of your industry expands, so too will your place within it.

As referenced many times by John F. Kennedy, a rising tide lifts all boats.

The key to success? Grit.

October 28, 2015 by Bruce Leave a Comment

One of The Five Elements of Success that make up the foundation of The Caveman’s Guide to Selling is the rock, which represents hard work and perseverance. Over the past few years, this concept has gained in popularity ever since Angela Lee Duckworth discussed “grit” in her famous TED talk The Key to Success? Grit.

In her own words,

“Grit is passion and perseverance for very long term goals. Grit is having stamina. Grit is sticking with your future day in, day out. Not just for the week, not just for the month, but for years. And working really hard to make that future a reality.”

According to Angela’s research in schools, at West Point, and in the private sector, her and her team found that grit was the number one characteristic that determined success. While the origins of grittiness are still being researched, Duckworth references Mindset, the work of Stanford University professor and author, Carol Dweck. I’m looking forward to discussing Dr. Dweck’s work in a future post.

The overall message:

In order to be successful, we must be willing to do the work. To experiment, to fail, to learn from our blunders AND to keep going. To persevere.

I hope you enjoy Angela’s talk as much as I did.

It’s not a zero sum game

October 26, 2015 by Bruce Leave a Comment

One of the biggest ah-ha moments of my selling career (and life for that matter), is when I realized that I can only compete with myself, and not other people.

Before I figured this out, I felt that if I applied my skills, worked hard, and continued to develop relationships, I had a good chance to finish at or near the top of the heap in my company’s rankings. Number one, was where I wanted to be.

Here in lies the problem.

Let’s say you absolutely kill it one year and someone else does even better. Does their success diminish your own? Did you not still have an amazing year?

Here’s the reality:

Your success isn’t relative to other people’s. It is not a zero sum game. The only thing you can control is your own production, not anyone else’s.

When you focus on what everyone else (or even just one person) is or isn’t accomplishing, it’s easy to lose sight of your own goals. What’s worse, your jealousy towards those you are comparing yourself to breeds a toxic work environment that infects not only your company, team, and industry, but also yourself. This kind of energy can be felt a million miles away, and is like a neon sign that reads “run for the hills! I’m super toxic”. No one wants to connect with that.

And let me just say, for the record, I am no saint. As embarrassing as it is to admit, there was a time when I took part in this ridiculous and toxic behavior.

I have since learned however, that wins are wins and they should be celebrated, regardless of who has them. By approaching wins in this way, I am better able to keep my goals in sight, because I am not caught up in a vicious cycle of negativity and jealousy. Instead I can focus on doing my best, bringing it everyday, and using my skills to affect what I can control.

The harder you work

October 12, 2015 by Bruce Leave a Comment

Typically the word “luck” and “lucky” are used by those who didn’t get the deal, especially when they are offering explanations of why someone else did. This time, it was simply a bluebird flying into the lucky one’s window and next time because the lucky one was married to the owner’s son. Different day, different excuse! What is always implied though, is that the “chosen” individual was given the Keys to the City and through no effort of their own.

Let’s be real here. It’s not about luck.

Show me a ”lucky” deal and I’ll show you one that took hours to complete and probably required blood, sweat, and tears. Quite frankly, it may have been brought back to life several times! In my experience, those receiving lucky breaks have been the exception and not the rule. Instead, I’ve found what Harvey McKay, author of Swim with the Sharks states as a more common truth:

“The harder you work, the luckier you get.”

When you‘re out doing the work, getting in front of people and developing relationships, good things happen. By putting energy into the system, things are bound to come out. Work Harder and You Will Get Luckier!

Perspective and Attitude

October 5, 2015 by Bruce Leave a Comment

I just came back from a three-day leadership conference for the non-profit organization for which I serve as a board member. As you might expect, it consisted mostly of meetings, speeches, lunches, and rapport-building with fellow members from all over the U.S.

Great opportunity and incredible experience, right?

As embarrassing as it to admit, I came away from the first day frustrated; feeling like I wasn’t getting out of the experience as much as I expected. But after reflecting on the day a bit more, I realized my mindset was all wrong. Up to that point, I was only concerned with taking from the experience, rather than contributing to it.

The following morning I promised myself I would change my perspective and attitude, reminding myself what it’s all about: to learn, connect, and develop relationships.

As a result, the second day was one I’ll never forget. One after another, inspiring chance encounters ensued. One of the most memorable was with a world-class speaker (who happened to be giving the keynote speech that day) who I had the privilege of connecting with on the pillars of relationship building and the part gratitude plays in this process. Aside from being great company, she was also exceptionally generous by offering me invaluable speaking tips!

As if things couldn’t get any better, I had the pleasure of listening to another great speaker discuss one of my favorite topics, how to connect with anyone; a crucial skill in moving others.

By the end of the conference, all of the wonderful things that come with connecting with others came flooding into my life, simply because I had shifted my mindset. By being open to listening, giving back, and contributing, I had not only learned ways in which I could better serve our organization, but I had made a few friends along the way too. That’s what it’s all about!